My Pearl

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When I settle in to write about my story I see the color of the blue sky on a warm March day. The day our life changed forever. The day we received the heartbreaking news at our 20-week ultrasound that our baby girl, Pearl, had a fatal condition and would not survive after her birth.

As we walked out of the doctor’s office, I knew the sky would never be the same color of blue. My husband and I drove home and began to make muffled plans to honor and celebrate the life of our Pearl. We had very little guidance as we started the process, but gathered a team of people around us to bring support and hold up our arms when we were too weary to walk.

We wanted to celebrate her life each day and make memories to last a lifetime. Each day was a gift and even as it hurt, we smiled through the tears and loved our baby well. We treasured ice cream at our favorite ice cream store, dancing to our song, a trip to Ireland and swinging at the park with her brothers and sister. Pearl danced gently in my belly and we fell more in love with her each day.

Twelve weeks after the diagnosis, it was time to meet Pearl. On a warm summer day in June, as we watched the sun rise and shower us with pink rays, Pearl was placed in our waiting arms. We kissed her goodbye, whispered secrets in her ears and bathed her with our tears. We will never forget the moments we had with Pearl and will treasure each memory and photograph lovingly snapped by our NILMDTS volunteer.

My experience as a labor and delivery nurse helped to shape our journey with Pearl. I was able to create a detailed Birth Plan, meet with other health care professionals, and craft a picture of what our delivery would be like. I also knew that many other families who were facing a fatal prenatal diagnosis did not have the same insight or resources available to them.

Finish reading “My Pearl” an excerpt  from the 10th Anniversary Commemorative Magazine by clicking on the image below.