People often give me kind words of affirmation… how wise I am for my age.. how well spoken I am in times when the right words are needed, but that wisdom came mostly from learning the hard way many times over.
This post is not one of those times where I have the words so before I go on, please understand that this is not easy to share, it’s actually quite gut wrenching, but God doesn’t give us one another for us to struggle alone. If you are someone that’s amid a struggle or a valley point in your life, know here and now, through this, you are not alone.
Halfway through the pregnancy of our youngest, our lives were changed forever. Our littlest love was diagnosed with a serious birth defect at our 20 week ultrasound. There was no cure. There was nothing we could have done differently to prevent the outcome. We didn’t know if he would pass away in utero or shortly after birth in our loving arms.
Photographs courtesy of the Adams family
At the time of the diagnosis, he was very active, kicking and punching. His heartbeat was 140 bpm and he was measuring normal based on his estimated due date. Everything about the pregnancy felt “normal” – 18 weeks of morning sickness, 25 lbs gained, food aversions, fatigue, crazy hormones…but our son, Ezra Jude had anencephaly.
Anencephaly is a type of neural tube defect that affected the development of his brain and skull. Anencephaly is estimated to affect 3 pregnancies in every 10,000 in the United States. The causes of anencephaly among most infants are unknown. There is no known cure or standard treatment. Almost all babies born with anencephaly will die shortly after birth.
We know that God doesn’t make mistakes and that while this is a difficult season, it is not without purpose.. And for those of you who are also going through a difficult season, know that we understand your struggle and you are not alone.” “The Lord is my strength and my shield, in whom my heart trusts. I am HELPED, so my heart rejoices; with my song I PRAISE him.”
EZRA (meaning “help”) JUDE (meaning “praise”) We love you❤️
Photograph courtesy of the Adams family